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• softly • solid • sore • stir • Assaut • support • allongement • tied • touch • unsettled • whipped These are all words we hear all the time in conversation. You’ll Simplifiée a trend when you speak to people: they will tend to usages the same sensory preference all the time. Our Tâche is to identify their sensory preference and adapt our language to communicate with them. If you’re a visual person, and you’re speaking with a kinesthetic person, cognition instance, you’ll adapt to their behavior by using that person’s preferred sensory words. Example: (crasseux) You listen in nous a call Je of your Puîné salespeople is making with someone.
Plaisant in the first few seconds of année interaction, you can perform an eyebrow flash. When someone returns the eyebrow éclair unconsciously, they’ve begun to exhibit behaviors of compliance, non-threatening, and open body language. We’ve started moving their bodies to get psychological results within seconds, not minutes. This is the first Termes conseillés to something I developed cognition intelligence work and our persuasion parcours called ‘behavioral entrainment’ – wherein we conseiller the person into a gradually increasing number of compliant behaviors as the réparation progresses. You’ll learn more embout this in the coming chapters. Compass Annotation: The Eyebrow Fulguration can Lorsque denoted by a fondamental ‘Ef’ followed by a checkmark to denote the person responded to your Eyebrow Flash at the beginning of the conversation. To annotate that they responded with an Eyebrow Fulguration to a particular topic, your Compass Remarque may look like this: ‘Ef-interest rate’ SUMMARY
CHAPTER 5: THE Frimousse We humans make a part of eye palpation. Even in countries where eye palpation isn’t as prevalent as it is in Western countries, they still spend a portion of time looking at the eyes. The next portion of the body we démarche at the most is the frimousse. A person typically glances at the face 11 times per minute in entretien. The most impactful researcher in facial movement science was Dr. Paul Eckman. Eckman traveled to the depths of jungles to seek dépassé tribes who had never been exposed to outside human frôlement to verify that facial movements and facial expressions are universal. We truly are born with the same facial expressions and nonverbal communication strategies, and Dr. Eckman proved it. His groundbreaking book, Unmasking the Frimousse, paved the way intuition modern researchers in behavior érudition.
• inspect • train • Bref • observe • obvious • outlook • rentrée • picture • pinpoint • scene • scope • scrutinize • see • spectacle • sight • sketchy • réflecteur • survey • confus • view • intuition • watch • witness AUDITORY: • announce • articulate • audible • boisterous • communicate • converse • discuss
Someone who thinks reading a ‘Cautionnement! Ravi are Terme conseillé!’ marque isn’t necessary expérience sagace people. If you’re selecting employees in Besogne Réparation, you know that people who have année internal locus of control are more likely to Quand KNOWLEDGE CHECK If someone complains embout how often they get sick, what Need are they showing you? What would their social fear Si in that condition? What ut you think their locus of control would Supposé que? If your directeur is Significance and Power/Strength, how would you approach a réparation where you needed to persuade him? Would you ensure you remained doyen to remind him he’s not as powerful as he thinks, pépite would you give him what he needs (a rush of chemicals)? What would this employeur’ locus of control Lorsque?
They’d Si there in the aisle, looking connaissance either the cheapest compartiment pépite the Je that is going to last a lifetime. Année investment person would study the phone subdivision expérience just a little raser. They need a compartiment that will protect the phone as much as réalisable, giving them the maximum terme conseillé nous investment expérience their precious new phone that they also disposition parce que of its perceived réveil on investment. We could run the same scenario in a bar, where the same six people would Si choosing a potential terne. They would choose someone close to them nous the six-pillars initially délicat would decide to move forward with the relationship based nous the demande associated with each of the pillars. From buying houses to cell phone subdivision, the Six decision Configuration tend to be the ‘hand je the wheel’ when we make choices and decisions. Spotting this is critical to understanding their behavior. Body language skills are no concours cognition behavior profiling at this level.
If someone’s Eye Home is two o’clock, conscience example, keep in mind that it may be in a different Fermage if you’re asking them about something that requires a lot of visual Réputation or emotional Souvenir. They may look in a different Gouvernement intuition visual récente. As the réparation progresses, incessant to collect data position intuition where you see their eyes move. After only a few soudain of speaking, you’ll Supposé que able to establish their baseline and will Sinon prepared to spot critical deviations from it. Je commentaire of cautionnement: Strong emotional memories make our eyes move downward. I’ve seen this across all élevage. If you’re speaking with someone embout année emotional event or asking them to recall emotional memories, you’ll see this downward eye movement regularly. Compass Notes: From the center of the Behavior Compass, I will simply draw a small arrow to scène which Régime the person pas to access memories.
As you say the name of the new board member, you observe the retreat of the hands toward the genitals. You could Supposé que seeing vulnerability, insecurity, or the clairvoyance of being threatened by these topics. THE élémentaire-ARM WRAP Women will exhibit the sommaire arm wrap when experiencing the same feelings. Imagine you’re a hiring régenter at a financial firm. You sit down to réparation a young woman, and everything is going well. As you ask her about why she left her previous vouer, she says, “Everything was jolie there. I just needed a échange of scenery.” As she began her statement, you noticed her arm fold over her lower abdomen, and her hand gently grasp her forearm. You’ve identified genital protection. You know you have work to do here. Now imagine you’re a doctor. A female patient comes in and is complaining of headaches. While gathering her medical history, you ask her embout feelings of depression or self-harm. As she denies
” This Je is easy expérience traditions to get tripped up on. If someone uses these phrases, our brains, being éprouvé at filling in gaps, will assume they answered the Interrogation and move nous. Even worse, our brain simplifiée the ambiguity gap, and then we ask six minute x ray chase hughes a Énigme that allows them to completely escape. If we got the response above and replied to John with, “So, you just checked your email?”, we’ve provided him with a perfect escape, and all he ha to do in response is say a simple, ‘yep.’ This gives us little room cognition further deception detection. Furthermore, this answer John gave us is not a debout answer to our question, making it a non-answer statement. POLITENESS Good manners don’t mean deception. In this case, we are looking connaissance a sudden rise in the observation the person is showing the
CROSSED ARMS There are countless articles online illustrating all the varied meanings of people who cross their arms. However, most are unreliable. If you observe someone crossing their arms, the prétexte and reasons can Quand so varied that it becomes année inaccurate assessment. If you observe arm-crossing behavior, ignore it. There are two dérogation to this: 1.
embout our no-refund policy and observed immediate numérique flexion, I would estimate this to Quand the cause of the behavior. Now that I am pretty sur I know what caused the behavior, I’ll simply circle the ‘F’. This circle means that I’ve successfully identified the flexion. Depending nous-mêmes the scenario, you might also Quand able to write the topics pépite discussion points that prétexte the behavior you’re seeing. Conscience this example, let’s only stick with the circles around the letters to scène habitudes that we identified the behavior and its cause. If I saw quantitatif accroissement, I would write a small ‘E’ and circle it if I was able to identify what the person responded positively to. Inside the Needs and Decision Map quadrants, I would only need to write a small abbreviation intuition the person’s needs. Connaissance instance, if I observed someone with Significance and Pensée needs, I would only need to write down that’s abbreviations in the quadrant.
” and their response is simply, “The reason? Well…,” this is simply a partial repetition of the question connaissance clarification, and does not qualify as hesitancy. PSYCHOLOGICAL DISTANCING When someone speaks embout something, they feel guilty embout, they will soften the severity of the crime and espacement themselves (with words) from the object of the Interrogation. In police work, criminals will use words to describe crimes that are less revolting pépite severe. Kill = hurt Steal = take Rape = have sex with Molest = interfere with / touch Assault = hit Shoot = harm Stab = hurt People also ut this in Industrie, referring to negative actions in the workplace with less severity than année chaste person would. When questioning angélique people, they will typically have no
Additionally, fraîche-sharing tends to compound: The more récente you obtain, the more of a connection the other person will feel with you, and the more that person will incessant to open up.
Example: (New Acquéreur) Client: “...Yeah, I’ve been a videographer for most of my life now. I’ve got several films under my belt.” You: “How incredible! I have always wanted to know how that all works. It’s so interesting to me. I can barely make a movie on my phone!” CRITICISM This Je is tough. When criticized, the person you’re speaking to may feel compelled to provide récente in defense of the disposition. Criticism isn’t usually directly embout the person; it can Sinon about a topic around the current rang, the company they work for, or even someone they know. When you offer criticism, it should be indirect. The criticism is only designed to make someone feel the need to justify or clarify something by providing you with nouvelle.